Consistency

I have not been consistent about writing here. I often sit and have thoughts swirling around my head and know that this is where they should live.

Now is the time for me to make some changes in my life. I have been perusing the Happiness Project site by Gretchen Rubin and I'm attempting to put together a Happiness Project of my own - let's see how it pans out.

New Day

I was thinking about the tone of my last post and how droning it sounded. Today, while not such a great day overall (clogged shower/bath pipes...in addition to all of the other awful house things that have happened lately), I've been thinking about some frivilous things.

I need to know why I am slightly obsessed with both Bethenny Frankel and Tori Spelling. While I'm a bit embarrassed by my slight obsession, I find that they both have very interesting (and similar) qualities. They're both very driven, type A personalities; are detail oriented, organized and environment oriented (their homes are well decorated, both are well put together women). They both seem so very down to earth (although somewhat annoying at times as well) and most recently, they're parents so they juggle the emotional, physical and daily demands of parenthood, personhood and couplehood so to speak.

I can't say that I admire these women for everything (they're both too thin and despite what they say about not having eating disorders or that they both don't diet - that's BS - they both have some sort of disordered eating patterns) but I can't help to find them interesting. I buy some of their books, follow them on Twitter and in some ways feel that they aren't too far from someone I could call a friend.

I feel better now - the ether (and my friend S) has this information and I'm liberated just a bit.

Ambivalence

The idea of blogging my thoughts is still something I'm not sure I really want to do. It seems a bit like willful indecent exposure and at the same time it also seems like I'm getting on the latest fad bandwagon.

The real reason I've decided to do this was to change the way I look at myself and my life. The name of this blog is based on a quote I read by an author named Caroline Knapp in a book called "Appetites: Why Women Want" published posthumously. The part of the quote that struck me reads, "...change is glacial in nature, charted not in victories but in inches and slight degrees...." A very core part of me took this theory to heart and allow me to change many things about my life and how I look at the world around me. However, I still see the need to further incorporate this theory and make it more substantial in my day to day life.

As a woman is chronologically forty, sometimes is as tired as someone who might be one hundred and forty but feels closer to twenty-eight, I have many things out of balance in my life. I'm hoping that type of exposition, the commitment to write out my thoughts, to do something different, will allow me to change some of my own thoughts and feelings.

I originally wanted to start this blog to document my journey to become more physically fit but perhaps the journey is to become more fit in a more balanced manner; to understand and be a greater part of the journey that is the glacier nature of change.